The Measure of Self-Fulfillment

Self-fulfillment \self-fül-fil-mənt\ n.: personal satisfaction; contentment or happiness as a result of personal work, initiative, or talent.

Summer is the only real break a student gets from all the hoopla of college, yet I chose to spend mine in the place that I was meant to get away from to begin with. To fulfill my co-requisites in the National Service Training Service Program (NSTP), I took the full load of my Civic Welfare Training Service (CWTS). I figured, what’s five weeks of summer classes compared to an entire semester of doing community service? It was a piece of cake. Or so I thought.

Assigned to work for Daniw Residence and Study Center, a project of the Kalinangan Youth Foundation, Inc., I had to commute to and from Katipunan for the rest of my summer. Great. Not only did that mean I had to make an effort to wake up earlier than usual and commute to get there on time, but I also had to shell out cash from my already meager allowance (which was one of the reasons I took summer classes, more or less.)

And as if that wasn’t enough, I was assigned to an all girls team. All girls? My already depleting enthusiasm just dropped a notch. Sigh.

So my summer begins.

But then, you didn’t really expect me to keep on whining until the end, did you?

As much as I wanted to keep on being pessimistic about “the summer that wasted away,” my efforts were futile. I had a great, if not the best, summer - ever.

I met 22 of the zaniest, craziest people this side of the planet. Just when I thought nobody could be at par with my outrageous sense of humor, I met these people who don’t just have a sense of humor - they actually are humor themselves (haha). Everyday brought a new punch line, a witty comment, or a drop-dead-funny experience. Not a single day passed that we didn’t have something to laugh our heads off. It gave us the energy to do the things assigned to us: going from house to house to interview families in the more underprivileged part of Katipunan; having to raise funds for our projects by selling whatever it is that we had to sell (ourselves not included) or just simply begging people to donate to charity; giving a mini library a total facelift; story-telling to a bunch of quite rowdy kids (and “accidentally” getting punched in the process); and having to practice our vanity by documenting everything (my favorite part).

Add to this brady bunch the coolest - and prettiest (ahem ahem) - mentors and ates to help us along the way. The best part was the feeling of security of having them around, and the additional laughs you get when you crack a joke. And during those times I needed someone who’d be willing to listen to me drone on and on about how unfair life is, they’re there, sitting right in front of you with a box of tissue.

Then there’s also the community we worked with. Park 7 was like a fish out of sea in Katipunan; I didn’t really expect to find an underprivileged community in a quite well to do place. But despite the hardships life has bequeathed upon them, I am still amazed by how they see life in a different, more positive light. What little life and fate had given them, they were still willing to share to us volunteers. We were there to at least make lives a little bit easier for them, but we found ourselves to be on the receiving end of the line. They were warm, hospitable, and friendly, and their smiles drove us to push through and keep on moving.

But the one thing that made quite an impression to me was the self-fulfillment we got from scraping paint, the first step in the renovation process of the mini library. You see, before you can apply any paint to the façade, you have to chip off the old paint, preventing the new paint from peeling off. And since the mini library hasn’t been taken care of that well for quite a long time, the paint was quite stubborn to work with. It was during this time that we learned to humble ourselves, by measuring our self-fulfillment by the size of the paint we’re able to peel off.

I’m not exaggerating when I talk about the rush of adrenaline on gets from peeling a large piece of paint off the wall (at least, not in our case). We would actually compare with each other. Yes, it may sound childish, but I actually learned something from it. I learned that when it comes to helping others, even the simplest things, such as a scrap of paint, can add a great deal to one’s measure of self-worth.

Summer may be over, but it’s only summer that’s over. CWTS has given me another once-upon-a-time to work with for the rest of my life. It was during my experience with Daniw, with my mentors, with Park 7, and with my team that I was introduced to a lot of things: the concept of dugyot (yes, there came a point when we had no choice but to look gusgusin); the value of a good laugh (which kept us sane when the heat’s driving us crazy); the importance of wearing the proper attire (my favorite pair of pants will never forget the shade of blue painted on the ceiling); and the worth of a good set of friends, who’d be there when the need be. And, oh, a cheeseburger can also go a long way.

Whenever I get the chance to work on fixing something up, I remember the pieces of paint we scrapped off a wall one summer, and the self-fulfillment we got from them.

It’s good to know my summer didn’t exactly go to waste as I thought it’d be.

(At dahil binasa mo ang paper ko, pa-cheeseburger ka naman oh… )